Apparently not every man loves football

Last night I rushed home from work to watch Monday Night Football with my 49ers playing the defending Superbowl Champs, the Saints. I wore my Joe Montana #16 jersey all day and was still wearing it when I stopped in Ralph's to grab a bottle of wine before watching the rest of the game at home.

As I'm standing in the Express checkout line and waiting for the slowest woman to pay and grab her groceries (of course not understanding the whole concept of an "Express Lane"), the guy loading his stuff on the conveyor belt behind me says out of nowhere, "The Giants lost this week didn't they?"

I kindly responded, "This is a 49ers jersey and they're playing tonight." Here's how the rest of the conversation played out...

"Oh so they lost."

"No, it's only the end of the first quarter. Sadly we're down 9-0."

"Oh, I thought they only played football on Sundays and Mondays, not the middle of the week."

"Well, today is Monday and they're playing Monday Night Football."

"Do they play football on Fridays or Saturdays?"

"No, not usually. Sometimes they play on Thursdays, but usually only Sundays and Monday night."

"So the 49ers are 0-2 already, huh?"

"No they're 0-1. This is the second game of the season. They won their three preseason games."

"It's only their second game? I thought it was at least the third week."

"Well this is the last game of second week play. The games this Sunday will count as the third week of play."

"And who's playing tonight?"

"The Niners and Saints"

"Ok. I just got hired to do a production on the football league and don't know anything about it at all."

"Well that's not good. You should start following ESPN."

"Yeah. Well thanks, you just saved me 15 minutes of searching on the Internet tonight when I get home."

OH MY GOD!!

How is it that I know more about football than a guy? Come on! And there is no way this was a flirtation attempt because no man would actually play dumb about football. I literally could not be more dumbfounded than I was last night. Also how does someone get hired to do a film production about a sport they have no clue about? Only in Hollywood I tell you...only in Hollywood.

Dating in LA...oh how it sucks

LA and the dating scene. Dear Lord where do I even begin with this post?

In my 5 years in LA I’ve had only one relationship that I will count as a “serious” relationship and that was my college boyfriend that I moved out to Los Angeles with. Besides that I’ve dated a commercial real estate broker, a Marine, a bartender, a restaurant owner, another bartender and someone who was just too old for me (Mr. Daly still yells at me for it to this day). And none of these “relationships,” if that’s what you want to call them, seem to have had any significance. So to sum it up I’m going to say I’ve had ONE real relationship in LA and dated a lot of frogs.


Here are my issues though:

- I don’t think I’m hideous. I’m no model but I definitely think I can pull my weight against half the created plastic figures out there. And besides, I’m a size 4 but a white girl with a booty. I don’t want to date a guy who needs them a size 0.

- I know there are good guys out there. Four of my best guy friends are dating four of my best girlfriends. These men have careers, are successful, attractive and are normal. Only thing – they all started dating BEFORE they moved to LA!

- I’ve sworn off dating actors and bartenders – I’ve therefore reduced myself to probably less than 50% of Los Angeles. Actors are too good at lying and bartenders are too good at flirting. When you date the combination it’s even worse.

- I will NEVER date a guy for his money!! Take out another 25% of the population.

So as an average girl living in the Hollywood Bubble and wanting to find a good looking, tall (6 foot please), successful, non-actor, non-bartender, normal guy, where do you find them? Most of the guys I see out at bars are cheese balls. I then travel to SF, New York or Washington, DC and there are normal guys in every bar I walk into.

What is it with LA? Why are the dating rules so different? Or better question, what am I doing wrong?

Am I being too picky? Well, sorry, my standards aren’t going to change and I don’t think I should sell myself short.

Do I move to a different city with REAL men? Sounds like a great idea except I just started a new job and the weather is just getting good.

Do I join an online dating site where you can be extremely picky and weed them out? Hmm…