In my 5 years in LA I’ve had only one relationship that I will count as a “serious” relationship and that was my college boyfriend that I moved out to Los Angeles with. Besides that I’ve dated a commercial real estate broker, a Marine, a bartender, a restaurant owner, another bartender and someone who was just too old for me (Mr. Daly still yells at me for it to this day). And none of these “relationships,” if that’s what you want to call them, seem to have had any significance. So to sum it up I’m going to say I’ve had ONE real relationship in LA and dated a lot of frogs.
Here are my issues though:
- I don’t think I’m hideous. I’m no model but I definitely think I can pull my weight against half the created plastic figures out there. And besides, I’m a size 4 but a white girl with a booty. I don’t want to date a guy who needs them a size 0.
- I know there are good guys out there. Four of my best guy friends are dating four of my best girlfriends. These men have careers, are successful, attractive and are normal. Only thing – they all started dating BEFORE they moved to LA!
- I’ve sworn off dating actors and bartenders – I’ve therefore reduced myself to probably less than 50% of Los Angeles. Actors are too good at lying and bartenders are too good at flirting. When you date the combination it’s even worse.
- I will NEVER date a guy for his money!! Take out another 25% of the population.
So as an average girl living in the Hollywood Bubble and wanting to find a good looking, tall (6 foot please), successful, non-actor, non-bartender, normal guy, where do you find them? Most of the guys I see out at bars are cheese balls. I then travel to SF, New York or Washington, DC and there are normal guys in every bar I walk into.
What is it with LA? Why are the dating rules so different? Or better question, what am I doing wrong?
Am I being too picky? Well, sorry, my standards aren’t going to change and I don’t think I should sell myself short.
Do I move to a different city with REAL men? Sounds like a great idea except I just started a new job and the weather is just getting good.
Do I join an online dating site where you can be extremely picky and weed them out? Hmm…
4 comments:
Might be WHERE in LA you're trying to find people. Certain parts of town tend to attract "Hollywood" types and certain parts of town tend to attract "regular" people.
Not that my L.A. dating luck has been any better than yours, LOL.
13 years in LA, and only 2 1/2 real relationships.
Your post represents the sentiments of at least 90% of the women I know out here, myself included. The men in Los Angeles a) have so many options in terms of women that they are reluctant to settle down in case something "better" comes along b) they have so many options in terms of PROMISCUOUS women or women who are fine with casual relationships that they want to have fun BEFORE settling down, or c) they're still trying to make things happen for themselves, (become a successful actor/writer/producer/director/music artist etc.) that they can only see the end goal of their career and aren't thinking about getting serious with anyone. (Often it's a combination of most or all these things.)
I'm originally from the east coast and have also visited other U.S. cities like SF, NY and DC. You're right, the dating culture is SO different. I'm looking to move from Los Angeles as soon as possible, my job has locations across the country and once I'm eligible I'll be asking for a transfer...
A friend of mine tried to convince me that it's an energy thing, that you can be anywhere and attract the right person if you have the right attitude and mentality about it. I say you don't journey to the desert expecting to find a glass of water. And L.A. is DRY when it comes to relationship minded men!
13 years in LA, and only 2 1/2 real relationships.
There is something wrong with the men in LA, and now I've started dating outside of LA I would say California. They are the most insecure people I've ever met in my life. I do much better since I learnt to pretend to be dumb, but it's hard to be as dumb and non-threatening as is required to get the results. I don't know how men pretend to like women just to get laid. I have resorted to just trying to find guys that I can pretend I like to have some kind of short lived romantic life. I used to be admired for my sharp with and high IQ. Now I feel like I am in the movie the Stepford Wives. Even at work I find I can get away with being paid a lot of money to do nothing all day if I just look confused and giggle. The men all love it and they do all the work for you. Not very forfilling for me though.
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